http://everydaylove2012.tumblr.com/

29 March 2012 - Today.Life is so immensely fucked up +...

Thu, 29 Mar 2012 11:10:00 -0400

29 March 2012 - Today.

Life is so immensely fucked up + ugly.
Still, so long as I am alive,
I cannot stop living.

Reading the news can really eff your shit up.

I compare my daily, personal struggles (education/loan debt; medical debt; mental and physical health problems; insurance bull crap; car troubles; pay check-to-pay check woes; job/career dissatisfacation; general quarter-life crisis…)—I compare this with one day’s worth of world problems…

Utter. Shame.

What comparison is there? But, am I not entitled to my life? It is struggle enough to not crumble under the weight of it all. It’s nothing in comparison, still, right?

I was reading about the lost and homeless pets in Japan (re: March 2011). And I am at work crying.

It’s difficult to not curse the people around me for their paltry banter about the most inconsequential things. Then, who am I to say what they care about?

Today - I am happy to have life…even though it’s all fucked up.

29 March 2012 - Today.

Thu, 29 Mar 2012 10:58:50 -0400

29 March 2012 - Today.

20 March 2012: Today. When all else fails, ask this of...

Tue, 20 Mar 2012 12:22:36 -0400

20 March 2012: Today.

When all else fails, ask this of yourself.

Then, carry on.

even for those who you feel inclined to...

Sun, 18 Mar 2012 02:16:00 -0400

even for those who you feel inclined to hate or judge.

i cannot understand. fathom. express.

Sun, 18 Mar 2012 01:59:57 -0400

i cannot understand. fathom. express.:

I have been avoiding reading anything about this situation because it would only infuriate me. This. This makes me question everything I want to believe in and about people. The article title calls it a “curious case.” What’s so curious about it? That the white assailant is free and one less black boy is living? This. This makes me scared for black babies and boys…especially the boys. Still. This. They can be murdered for any ol’ reason. And nothing. No recourse. Not mass outcry.

This is not the type of post I want to make here - perhaps, this would have been more suited from my personal tumblr and blog. I don’t know. All faith in humanity is lost with these things. You are not safe from the ill intentions of people who think you fit a profile, who think you are plotting. It makes me sick. Sick. Sick. Sick. If you still want to believe racism and ALL it’s counterparts do not exist and are not rampant in 2012 — you are delusional. And while I aim to love everyone - even my enemies and those who seek to harm me (this is difficult) - I find it hard when I hear of things like this.

when i say i have been on a learn-all-things-buddhism kick...

Sun, 18 Mar 2012 01:40:00 -0400

…i mean that.

And everything I am reading and have read is uncanny.

This, above all else, is what I have been striving for in my everyday life.

I have a tattoo that reads lovepeacehappiness/amorpazfelicidad. I thought, “If I cannot have these things in my physical life, I will have them with me eternally.”

I seek love daily. I seek peace daily. I seek happiness daily.

Though, I would probably settle for the constant love and peace over happiness. Happiness is tricky. I think.

But, like I told a friend just a few days ago, the world is ending (figuratively, mostly) and there are greater things to worry about (than anything I am currently stressing).

Carrying on, I shall.

I am mostly just reading things on the internet about Buddhism (I am most intrigued by the idea of lovingkindness. THIS is me—to love and be kind. I have long considered kindness to be my true religion. Mmmm). I am reading a lot on StumbleUpon. I will probably buy a few books (hardcopy to fully enjoy the process of highlighting and margin writing).

I cringe at the idea of “Zen living” and yoga and Buddhism, since they’ve been completely romanticized and watered down by the media and the folks we call celebrities. It’s as if only the rich and famous and well-to-do are allowed to have and/or seek peace.

Meh.

The ideas are simple and not at all confounded. Love. Kindness. Suffering. Peace.

I am naturally drawn to this. It makes sense that I absorb this ideology for myself.

Right?

hello, lovers.

Sun, 18 Mar 2012 01:30:00 -0400

it’s been too long.

10 March 2012 — Today.

Sat, 10 Mar 2012 08:40:28 -0500

10 March 2012 — Today.

Sat, 10 Mar 2012 08:40:09 -0500

10 March 2012 — Today.

Sat, 10 Mar 2012 08:39:54 -0500

10 March 2012 — Today.

"There’s a new thing out called ambition. Get some."

Sat, 10 Mar 2012 00:06:54 -0500

“There’s a new thing out called ambition. Get some.”

- “King of Queens”

"The only way to get through it is to get through it."

Fri, 09 Mar 2012 15:46:19 -0500

“The only way to get through it is to get through it.”

- “New Girl”

The Power of Words. Lovely. via Jeremy Cowart, via Google+.

Fri, 09 Mar 2012 11:43:00 -0500

The Power of Words.

Lovely.

via Jeremy Cowart, via Google+.

oliviajani: Nice. And right on time. While I still have my...

Fri, 09 Mar 2012 11:22:00 -0500

oliviajani:

Nice. And right on time. While I still have my (personal) account, I am making concerted choice to not log on. Facebook will be the death of me…if I don’t do something now.

Photo

Fri, 09 Mar 2012 10:57:47 -0500

08 March 2012 - Today—Facebook.I have decided that it’s...

Fri, 09 Mar 2012 09:19:00 -0500

08 March 2012 - Today—Facebook.

I have decided that it’s not for me…right now.

Old lovers, old friends, people are seemingly happy and have all the things I think I want.

There’s too much fodder for self-loathing. Too much for me to whine and wallow in and about.

I do enjoy seeing updates of pregnant friends and of their toddlers. I love seeing hair style and fashion and travel updates.

But, overall, Facebook does nothing more than give me fuel. I burn my own happiness and life to to mere ashes. I burn myself nonstop—wondering and crying and worrying. Why, why, why! Why not me? What about me?

So, as simple as it seems, I am starting with a 24-hour break…with hopes of stretching it into a 90-day fast. I am a Facebook-fiend, so I want to be realistic. I do keep in touch with people (for writing and meetings and various social actitvities), so at the very least I may check it periodically for just that purpose. Maybe.

You can’t give me any peace, Facebook. I will never be able to focus solely on my own green grass, if I am ever grasping for other people’s lives…ever pining for the love I do not have. And sometimes, you just have to let it go.

buenos días.

Fri, 09 Mar 2012 08:23:51 -0500

"We’re all looking for the same thing—the same peace, the same love, the same..."

Thu, 08 Mar 2012 16:56:00 -0500

“We’re all looking for the same thing—the same peace, the same love, the same contentment. If you could just be the first to admit it, everyone and everything else would be okay.”

- Everyday Love 2012.

paz.

Thu, 08 Mar 2012 15:36:58 -0500

paz.

Photo

Thu, 08 Mar 2012 15:21:00 -0500